I have avoided posting anything on my blog. For two and a half months I have avoided it. Finally, after numerous fruitless attempts and broken promises, I committed to putting something else up here, no matter what might happen.
Is this what writers’ block looks like? Does this match other writers’ descriptions of feeling “stuck?” But it wasn’t for want of things to say that I’ve stalled. Rather, for the last ten weeks, every subject I thought to write about would get shot down in my head with the thought, “But so-and-so might read that; I can’t have them know that about me!”
So it has come down to a question of vulnerability. And I really hate being vulnerable. Hell, I didn’t even like writing the “V” word. But a lot of what scurries around in my brain should never see the light of day.
On the other hand, I think about writers I admire: D.H. Lawrence, Erica Jong, Anne Sexton, Sherman Alexie. To one degree or another all of them have written autobiographically; and all of them put their vulnerability on paper. Every writer has to bare his or her soul at some point; it simply comes with the territory.
How to resolve the conflict?
Well, I started by admitting to feeling vulnerable. At least I’ve taken the plunge and broken through my “dry spell.” Stay tuned to see where this leads me. I surely don’t know where that will be.